MELANA
DOCUMENTARY
“The personal is political.”
Unknown feminist author
POETRY OF ONE’S SELF
Family relationships expand into human relations - human relationships toward its environment.
It is obvious to me that art is determined by the social context. It responds to events, clarifies trends and foresees future possibilities. These powers make it one of the important activities in society. Art itself is a tool that can be used to open new possibilities. That is why it should address something precisely, by creating an object that opens doors to new prospections. Otherwise, if artworks are viewed as independent from everything, without a clear message addressed to a specific situation, the potentials of art are lost in confusion. Art must do more than just call attention to itself.
I am interested to work on the subject of family relation and it’s impact in our lives. Family is the first source of our knowledge. Besides we are biological product of our parents we are also ideological product of them. We will act through what we learned from their beliefs – about the world and about themselves. I would like to question the source of knowledge and by doing so I wish to bring notion of existence of other ways, possibilities of knowing our actions differently, which might be an alternatives to those habits which we have taken to be the most “natural” as our own.
Our parents coming from their families, theirs families from theirs parents and etc. Itself family is “society” and product of its’ ideology and culture. It’s an organize group that more or less sharing system of beliefs. Theirs education came from teachers they encountered in their lives, friends, street, political and economical situation of their countries, history, religion and etc. They live with their beliefs about possible or impossible, right and wrong, relationships, logic and etc. It is a huge pile of information they are carrying and the child will gather this “data” and take it without questioning it.
Is it more family members or society that influences us? Which one is more important? These are question for discussion, but for this project I would like to tell you personal family stories and through this stories I wish to open subject for discussion about it’s impact and influences in my life and also share my personal struggle for freedom.
VISUAL PART
For the visual expression I am using symbolic language. It has a possibility to bring information from unconscious to the conscious mind and unfold unknown. Symbolic language will help me to face hidden problems and fears.
For many years, in many ancient cultures, symbolism is considered as the language that speaks and influences unconscious. Fore C.G. Jung unconscious speaks through symbolic imagesin the dreams. “A symbol implies something vague and partially unknown or hidden fromus from our conscious mind and is never precisely defined. “ (1) It carries messages from the unconscious to the rational mind. My intention is to show those influences that have impacts on our decisions and understanding of life.
(2) “All products of the unconscious are symbolic and can be taken as guiding messages. What is the dream or fantasy leading the person toward? The unconscious will live, and will move us, whether we like it or not.”
1;2 «L’homme et ses symboles» C.G.Jung
THE STORY BEHIND THE FORM
There was a time when I used to write a lot. It was before I started to be interested in visualart. I was a very quiet child, never talking too much but always writing personal stories, poems, lyrics etc....When my mother finds out that I was writing the stories she got angry and aggressive. I guess she was just scared that I would hide things from her, that instead of talking to her I would only write. And so she would never find out if I had any problems or difficulties as a teenage girl.By acting this way she gave me the feeling that I betrayed her, that I did something wrong andI had to change my behavior. I really felt that I failed her expectations and in some way closed myself to her. For this reason one day I collected all I had, all my books, papers and burnt them. I did not even let myself to be sad. It was more sacrifice, like sacrifice joy for my mother. After this event I completely stopped writing.
After some time I started to draw on paper very symbolic drawings with black and red pens, but without conscious understanding of what was going on deep in myself. When it came to my mind that it was similar to what I was writing before I eventually stopped creating such kind of drawings.
After all these years, I understood, that through this action of prohibition to write, my mother has committed an act of (symbolic) castration. This sort of castration might prevent us from enjoyment; enjoyment in writing, enjoyment in creation or even sexual enjoyment. This act is still present inside me, forbidding me to continue to be creative and in some ways maintaining the idea that I can’t write properly and that I don’t have any talent.
All the findings about this story will be applied metaphorically and symbolically into practice through installation that will be mix of drawings, ashes of old photography and sculpture made of candy. Those images are the realization of my childhood story.
Installation will be built with three main elements.
CONCLUSION
This work is a combination of past events, present moment and future possibilities. It is a symbolic act to face hidden fears and problems. It represents a person’s ability of letting go of fears and being able to “BE”.
There are events in our life’s that give insights to our decisions and can even change our perceptions of life. From our childhood we learn many things. The first source of knowledge is our parents and then the environment we were growing in. This knowledge and experience might be a gift for us but can become a heavy burden.
This work intends to question this knowledge and to open the subject to discussion.
I hope to create a work that will help me analyze and face my own fears and problems coming from my past. And this will be a proposition that opens door of possibilities for others to fight their own fears and problems.
By sharing a personal story through symbolic language I hope to touch the viewers’ deeper sensations and bring a bit of hope into this world full of problems and confusions.
Through the wishes to speak to the unconscious and I hope to help others remember the importance of finding one’s true self.
Are we a product of our family? Society? Universe? Who are we?